Jumaat yang mulia...

Hari ni mengikut calender mayan suppose to be the end of the world... itu cuma ramalan... tp Allah Maha Berkuasa... kalau end, end la... kalau Dia rasa belum masanya, belum la masanya...

Duduk makan sarapan di kedai mamak sambil tunggu makanan dibungkus untuk anak-anak, datang satu kumpulan budak-budak sebaya Sang Bijak.  They were asking among themselves what to have and sambil tu tanya berapa harga nasi lemak, berapa harga roti canai etc. End up ada yg order ais kosong and nasi lemak, ada yg roti canai saja, ada yg teh o ais saja.  Aduh sayu nya hati Xena... anak-anak Xena tak pernah consider harga bila nak makan dan boleh order apa saja mereka nak makan... bila tengok anak-anak yg perlu consider costing untuk sarapan di kedai mamak, rasa sedih sangat...

So, I did the necessary... I hope they had a good breakfast... :)

~bersyukur~
Xena
21.12.2012

Numb...

Adjusting, compromising, tolerating, giving in, accepting, agreeing, swallowing, crying... and along the way my heart has become numb...

No feelings... no beatings... just a lump of a flesh... no soul... no nothing...

My life ahead is just an obligation, a responsibility... for the sake of my children's happiness, for the sake of my other half's happiness and for the sake of my family's happiness... nothing is about me anymore... it about about others, others and others...

~heartless Xena~
Monday
10 Dec 2012
6:35pm

Kedekut vs jimat

Apa beza kedekut dgn jimat? This is my humble opinion lah kan...

Kedekut ni orangnya yang sayang sangat dengan hartanya terutama wang ringgit that dia sanggup hidup serba kekurangan supaya duitnya tidak luak.  Mereka bukan tak de duit, selalunya banyak, tapi tidak mahu menggunakannya untuk diri mereka apatah lagi untuk orang lain. Orang kedekut ni akan sanggup kaut atau menempek kat orang lain, mana boleh kaut atau amik keuntungan atas orang lain.  Mereka ini sanggup dan tebal muka untuk meminta pada orang lain dengaan tujuan mereka tidak perlu keluarkan duit. Selalunya mereka ni jenis berkira. And depa lebih suka kalau orang yg keluarkan duit untuk depa.  Orang kedekut ingat by behaving like that they get to keep their money and they will be rich. 

Orang yang jimat pulak on the other hand is a practical person. Dia cuba cari kos yg paling murah dan berbaloi and mostly their intention is for the benefit of the family.  Unlike kedekut, orang yang jimat tidak hanya pikir dirinya sendiri.  Atau pun dia berjimat untuk menyinpan wangnya untuk tujuan membeli sesuatu untuk dirinya atau orang tersayang.  Orang yg jimat selalunya tidak kedekut untuk belanja sesuatu untuk dirinya atau keluarganya.  Dia mungkin akan jimat or cut cost somewhere in order to channel the money to something else.

This is just my personal opinion je la... jangan la kita jadi org yg kedekut a.k.a bakhil sebab itu perangai yang Allah tak suka....

~philosophical Xena~
20 Nov 2012
8:39pm

Shuh, go away that nasty feeling...

New year's day... Maal Hijrah... permulaan bagi tahun yang baru...

My coming year may seem gloomy as it started in a 'raining' season. Tried to 'shuh' the feeling away but I can't put them away. Hati ini amat terguris tapi I am not allowed to express how I feel. In fact I believe I am not allowed to feel that way. I am wrong to feel like this as I was told.

Only Allah knows how I feel now as no other will understand if I tell then how I feel.  So let it be...

Now i have to find a way to stop these tears as it wont stop flowing... please stop!

Anyway, salam maal hijrah semua, have a good rest day...

~deeply hurt Xena~
1 Muharam
15 November 2012
8:13am

Bukan sekadar kata-kata...

I believe in action speaks louder than words. You can say or write a lot of things. You can say or write you love somebody with all your heart. But eventually your actions will determine your true feeling....

In a previous posting, I've once mentioned that little gesture are more precious than having to say that he loves me. Biarlah dia tak ungkapkan kata-kata manis, tulis kat blog saying he loves me more than the world but he is loyal, helps me with the housework without being asked to, take care of me when I am sick, gentle when talking, never lay a finger on me...

I have seen people write the loveliest things about their wives, but do things that crushes their wives' heart. Hurt them but at the same time call them 'Sayang'. Their action just contradict the words they say or write. Totally confusing.... Or maybe they are confused themselves?

In a separate note, I come to realise that many out there are living in denial. They don't like to hear the truth and live in a masked world. Too bad I'm the type that will speak out and spell out the true situation. Yes it may be bitter but that is the true fact whether you like it or not. For those who can't handle this, I apologies. You may hate me now but one day you will thank me unless you are happy just the way it is.

For me, being a good friend is being able to tell you the truth straight to your face rather than talk bad behind your back. I have a good friend which I have known since I am 10 years old who can just tell me things for me to improve and I never get offended because I know her intention is good. She will truthfully tells me if a dress suits me or not and not just agreeing with me just because I like it or just nak jaga hati. But then that is me. Others may not agree with me. I can't force people to understand that neither I want people to force me to change. We are individual.

Anyway, feel free to disagree with me because you are you and I am me...

~don't give a damn Xena~
Raya Haji eve
25th October 2012
10:38pm

It's not easy...

To live in harmony is not easy...
Most of the time we have to adjust...
And also to adapt so that we are accepted...
It's not easy but I will not defeat...
Put your head high and face it with pride and dignity...
Push away those negative thoughts...
Push away those unfair feeling...
Do what is right even if you think it is not right...
The important thing is the happiness of your loved ones...
Never question back or question about injustice...
Just do it... For the sake of harmony...

A boost of motivation to myself...

~trying hard to be perfect Xena~
Thursday
4 Oct 2012

What a day it was....

Yesterday was one of those days.... Started off my day with my iPhone being halfway done upgreded to IOS6, it couldn't be used until it is done.  Can't wait till it is done cause I have a meeting to attend at 9pm.

Then, got scolded for not following instructions which was my fault, no doubt.  Sometimes being proactive may not be the right thing to do....

Got in the office early as planned.  Went straight to the meeting room, setup my laptop and waited.  Just after a few minutes opening my mails, I received a mail informing that the meeting has been postponed till 10am.  Hmmmm never mind, just sit in the meeting room and cleared my mails.

Meeting was like a meeting lah! It was my first time attending it.  Nothing to shout about but interesting experience.  Meeting ended about 1:30pm.

Straight after that meeting, continued with a discussion which ended about 3pm.  Only at 3:30pm I managed to grab my lunch!  At 5pm we had our townhall meeting.  I could wait for snack time as I had to leave to pick up my son from school.

On top of that, received some news from Roohii.  News that also give us frustration.  But somehow we managed to find a solution to the slight hiccup and we were back on our feet.

It was really a tough day for me.  The though part was actually being caught by surprises a few times. I don't like being lied to and I don't like being cheated.  I am a transparent person.  Be frank with me.

Anyway, got home, bought Nasi Kukus, had dinner with Roohii, did a few chores which cleared my mind and I was much better....

~dissapointed Xena~
Friday
21st September 2012

It's ok, you'll be fine...

I am so used to being left out... Since that day till now... The price for being seen as having more and more successful than them...

Being married to the youngest sibling in the family, I always thought the youngest always have the previlage. Now I know it is not always the case. Manja yes but other than that, nope! I suppose I should have seen it because I am the eldest in my family. What I say always counts, hahaha...

In a way, I thank Allah for what he has planned for. At least I get to feel how my other sibling feels and I try not to do the same. Life is a learning curve, for those who pick it up la kan... Some people tak amik kisah pun, still buat cam gitu gak... Jenis stone face...

Since dah kena banyak kali, I really have to learn my lesson and never expect more from them. The thing is that if I were the one who did like what they did, I am for sure to be critised. But when they did it, it is ok. Well, life is never fair kan?

But it is ok Xena, it's not like you can't go by yourself right? Sampai ke London pegi sendiri with no problem isn't it?

Don't you worry honey... Don't let this pull your spirits down... Your happiness in life does not depend on them... It's in my hands!!

~highly spirited Xena~
Sunday
Malaysia Day 2012
1:48pm

Aisyeh, more not-so-nice news...

Today I got to know another friend of mine having a second family. It's really sad cause this guy married his school sweetheart. Bercinta bagai nak rak from secondary school, then A-Levels, then overseas... Kira macam romeo and juliet lah! Tup, tup kahwin lagi satu gak. Sayang sungguh pada wifenya ya sampai sanggup menduakan isterinya...

Tapi bila dianalise situationnya, his second wife is a staff nurse kat hospital he is working. Agaknya tengok hari-hari malah waktu dgn staff nurse tu adalah lebih daripada time dengan wifenya. So cinta berputik dan dari buat maksiat baik kahwin iya dak? Hmmmm whatever *with head roll and hand gesture*!

So conclusion di sini, to keep the love flaming at all times, nak kena spend more time with your partner. Sebab banyak sangat kes second wife seorang pilot is a stewardess, second wife a doctor is a nurse, second wife a big boss is the secretary. Kebanyakan kes la kan... Tapi Xena juga realise bila dah berkahwin lama (more than 10 year) husband and wife jarang nak spend time together. Tak tau le sebab dah jemu ke, atau dah naik menyampah. Atau isteri terlampau sibuk dgn urusan anak-anak dan kerja rumah, suami pulak sibuk bekerja mencari duit untuk keluarga. For Xena, I always believe spending quality time with your spouse macam time bercinta dulu amat penting. Sayangnya culture kita idak gitu... Bila nampak suami isteri yg middle age dok bermesra-mesraan atau bermanja-manjaan, orang naik meluat. Buang tebiat katanya. Get a room katanya. Pelik sungguh... Xena seronok tengok orang mabuk bercinta, nak-nak yg da bertahun-tahun berkahwin...

Oh well, itu la lumrah kehidupan kita di sini, Malaysia negaraku tercinta... (since still merdeka month, be a bit patriotic la ya!).

~accepted Xena~
5 September 2012
10:18pm

Blabber for the night...

While waiting for the doctor to call back for the results of my dad's blood test, might as well I just blabber out what I feel and think tonight...

Allah test us with money, power / position, women (for men) and luxury. Most of the time people tend to forget their roots once they have some extra money or money comes in their pocket in abundance. Normally people who measure success in life by having plenty of money and wealth are most likely to forget their roots or the Malay would says "lupa daratan". People who likes to show off their wealth, those who wants and loved to be praised, those who loves when people look at them because they are using the latest gadget, these are the people who, once have a little bit extra in their life, will think that they are the best and perfect person in the world. Nobody else is better than them. They forget to respect their elderly, they even forget who their elder sister or elder brother are. They no longer respect their sibling cause they think they are the most successful people in the family. They might interprate this comment as being jealous of their success but little that they know that they have hurt other people's feeling by their lack of respect of other people. Younger sister will now be rude to the elder sister. Younger brother no longer care about his elder brother.

Then there this people who are selfish, thinking for just themselves and nothing else but themselves. These type of people will just do whatever they like without thinking or considering the feeling of others. The combination of this and the above attitute makes it even worse!

Other annoying attitute is not being punctual. I mean, please la, think of others. While the rest can make it on time and make effort to not waste other people's time, why can't you? And the best part, not even an apology for being late. Not to mention you are the one always being late and people have just to accomodate with your attitute. It's really annoying! This is part of selfishness.

So, in life you must be humble. Don't think that just because you have that much money that you are so great. Don't think that you have spend such an amount of money for your parents that the other siblings are at a lower class than you. You wouldn't know, your other siblings may have contributed more but quietly. There are others that have much more than you but act so humble. And finally the world does not revolves around you only!!!

~they-you-go Xena~
Thursday
27 Ramadhan 2012

Yet another story...

Adoi, today dengar another story about a potential 'kecurangan'... Sad, angry, dissapointed... Mixed feeling... Kalau kita yg tak de kena mengena pun rasa cam gini, wife dia apa tah lagi...

Is it a norm especially at this time of the hour, I mean 40ies? Midlife crisis, some of them call it... But I believe that are all excuses. The main reason I believe is that 40s is the period that a men are at their comfort zone. Kids grown up, stable career, financially stable and probably don't know how to spend those extra cash that they have. The wife is also going downhill, body wise, urge wise, health wise. And plus many girls out there are looking for this type of men, to be the 'pillar' of their life!

Well guys, if a girl wants you when you are at your peak period especially when your pocket is full, your career is booming and everything is pleasant and luxury for her, trust me, when you are ill or dying, I don't think she care to take care of you, because they never felt the difficulties living with you. It's the lady who has been with you thick or thin that will stay on when you are at your lowest point, if she is still with you of course!

O well, another fact of life that I have to accept and swallow. My doa is of course that my soulmate be a loyal husband and that I do not have to face all this heart-breakening situation.

For those ladies out that whose husband is fooling around with another women while you are being loyal to your husband, I pray for your patience and strength to carry on with your life. May Allah bless you all always...

~a bit disturbed Xena~
Sunday
13 August 2012
12:16am

Every little gesture matters...

Less is more...

A small gesture like pouring me my drink without being asked is an indication he loves and care about me...

That iftar I noticed my glass keep on being full despite drinking and gulping down my 'air asam boi'. He has been filling up my glass without being ask to do so. I thought that was a very nice gesture...

~touched Xena~
Thursday
9 Aug 2012
10:58pm

Perception, prejudice, judgmental and assumption

If you can see, the title comprises of negative words. Well, it is normally used negatively in the real world.

Perception, what other see you as. What people think about you. We may do something but our surroundings, which may include your soulmate, will perceived it as something else. So do we behave to let people have a positive perception about you, or just be yourself? This has been a question that I ask myself again and again from those days till now. At times we try to behave to get positive perception by others but most of the time people will have negative perception first before can think rationally and see it from our angle. By that time it is too late. The impact of the negative perception has taken in place and can not be rectified just like that.

Prejudise, in my own terms is similar to mindset. Negative perception on a person will lead to a mindset. Once the mind has been set, all other actions done by that person becomes a negative thing, perceived as negative, leading to more and more negative perceptions.

Once we have negative perceptions, have mindsets, we tend to judge. Sometime assumption comes into the picture. People tend to just make their own thinking without having to verify what they think about the situation. Attempts to get a clearer picture is also misinterpreted as being confrontational and our culture does not like confrontation especially when the elder or 'above' person is being 'questioned'.

With this mixture, I question again, is it worthwhile thinking of what people think about us because no matter what we do people will see it as a negative thing? But then 'apa aku kesah' attitute is also seen a negative kan??? Hahahaha...

In a separate note, people nowadays tend to justify their wrong actions with so many reasons to make their wrongdoing as something right. In a situation where it is obvious what she is doing is wrong thing (e.g. Infedility), most of the time she will keep on justifying the reason she become like that e.g. because the husband does not pay attention to her, too busy or the husband is having an affair himself. When the surrounding people talk about her infidelity, she will then say that people have an negative perception on her. And because she feels like she has not done anything wrong, hence other people is wrong by talking bad about her. This type of person is in denial or refuse to admit their mistakes. They think that their doings are always right, that they do not do anything wrong as their wrongdoings are always justified. Most of the time this type of people are people who live in this world without values and principles.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that in:
1) Whatever we do we have to behave in such a way that our conscience is clear with good intentions.
2) People will always see us as doing something bad even if we have good intentions.
3) We have to hold on to life principles and to know what is right and what is wrong. A wrong thing is a wrong thing and nothing can change its status. A lie is a lie and there is no such thing as a 'bohong sunat'. Infidility is wrong and there is nothing right about 'main kayu tiga' and being 'curang'. Stealing or taking things that are not yours or not meant for you is wrong. There is nothing right about using your petrol card which your company give to you for your usage to fill up petrol in your spouse's car. There is nothing right about your relatives using mobile phone which was provided by the company to make long distance call.

Disclaimer: this is not meant to target anybody but merely a reminder for myself.

~tired Xena~
8 Ramadhan 2012

The thing that makes my heart sink...

You all ada tak when you all listen to a particular song at a particular time, tiba-tiba rasa sebak and nak jatuh air mata? Haaa Xena terasa cam gitu la jap tadi...

Today I got to know yet another case of 'multiple love', kecurangan, kasih beralih arah dan kemungkinan poligami...

All this while I only see it on telly... Then it happened to a good friend, then another case and another and another... Dah jadi macam trend la pulak, a norm... Yang sedihnya adalah pihak isteri yg pertama lah. Yang merampas tu idak le rasa apa sangat kan, tapi bagi yang haknya dikongsi tu la of courselah yang akan merana...

Kenapa mesti jadi gitu kan? Latest case is my own relative, my own flesh and blood... I just could not comprehend... Yang jantan tu tak kesian ke pada isterinya? Tak ke dia terpikir dia melukakan hati isterinya? Walaupun si isteri kata dia redha dan izinkan suaminya kahwin lain tak terpikir ke macam mana hancurnya hati sang isteri tu? Sesungguhnya Xena tak faham dan tak mungkin akan faham...

Yang third person tu pulak, tak ke pikir perasaan sang isteri? Desperate sangat ke? You are also a woman, you should know how the wife would feel. Tak terpikir ke merampas tu nanti satu hari akan dirampas? I simply do not understand...

Selalunya bila jadi gini, mulalah mencari alasan especially alasan berasaskan agama lah. Dirikan masjid lah, payung emas lah... Habis tu yg sebelum nak tambah pahala, curang kat isteri tu dapat pahala ke? Menipu isteri tak berdosa ke? Buat benda tak elok belakang isteri tu boleh diterima ke? For sure la ada dating kan... So kiranya buat dosa dulu peh tu cover balik dengan pahala dirikan masjid ek? Eeeee tak boleh nak terimalah!!!

Bila kita pertikaian macam ni, kita dilabel anti-poligami, anti-islam dan tak beragama. Orang perempuan juga dipersalahkan. That is always the case. Bila kata tak adil salah jugak tapi Xena tak nampak keadilannya disini. The best they would tell us, benefitnya is not now but during afterlife... Wallahualam....

Sakit otak memikirkan benda-benda remeh cam gini... And yang sedih is the wife especially the wife is so loyal to the husband....

Emmmmm alahai... Xena tak suka, tak suka, tak suka....

June - July 2012... Travelling tak sudah!

June and July were the months of travelling... I think I definitely put on a lot of weight these 2 months for sure!

End June I went to Beijing. Last minute my boss informed me that we had to attend the regional meeting hosted by our China counterpart. Yippie! Got the chance to climb the Great Wall of China. Beijing was nothing to shout about. Didn't like the people, people are rude there. Food also nothing great but we found a couple of muslim restaurant around town, so we had the chance to taste the local food. Great Wall of China was great but our colleague brought us to the wrong entrance. She brought us to the entrace whereby people need to take the cable car to go up. Unfortunately, Xena not as brave as what people perceived... me sooooo scared of cable car! My phobia... So ended up climbing the stair which took us about half hour to 45 minutes. Quite a challenge!!! Nasib baik mak pegi la jgk ke kelas si Riyo tu, if not pancit la jugak! But the climb was worthwhile... The view, undescribable!

A week after Beijing trip, I went to Bangkok, attending this meeting organised by regulators. That was kindda fun as my fellow regulatory friends also attending that meeting. So it was basically like a mini reunion plus mingling with the government officers, rubbing our shoulders... Bangkok, a shopping heaven, lead me having to change my currency a couple of times. Really, really made me broke!

Just as I reached home from Bangkok, the next day we took off to Sg Klah. This time is the GBB trip. The kids had tremendous fun. All day in the pool plus the Sg Bil unplanned picnic.

The weekend after that the GBB went to Penang for our last kopek makan trip before the fasting month start... That was really a trip testing our stomach tolerability!!! Unfortunately I didn't get my durian, which was a blessing actually... If not I think I would have burst of gluttony!!!

Next round of trip would be after raya... Cherating with the family and Chiangmai with GBB (yes, again!)...

Good luck Xena!

My birthday adventure...

This blog entry is way, way overdue.... it took me a while to draft this out, selecting the pictures and actually publishing it.... here it goes!

28th April 2012... my birthday....

Dulu-dulu ada gak terima bunga kat ofis time birthday but I told Roohii toksah dok bazir duit lah. Memang la seronok dpt bunga tapi dah le mahal satu hal, peh tu cam tiap tahun mcm expected je so jadi mcm kurang trillnya. Yg syok tu bila tiba-tiba, out of the blue bunga tu tiba kat ofis (hinting mode!).

Anyway itu bukan cerita yg nak dituliskan. Ni nak cerita adventure yg Xena buat birthday tahun 2012....

Bersama geng GBB, we went for a biking trip to Kanchanaburi. Mana itu? Haaaa sila tgk peta di bawah...

We started our journey Friday 27th April, my birthday eve. Tayar golek kul 5pm dari R&R Rawang and we stopped over kat kat Juru for dinner. Sambung perjalanan ke Hatyai and sampai kurang pukul 11 lebih. Ada yg flat terus tidur, ada yg ke 7-Eleven, ada yg mengurut! Roohi and me went out to buy drinks (panas sangat and and the local prepaid simcards.

 
Dinner kat Juru...









28th April 2012, Saturday
The next morning (yes my birthday!) we took off to continue our journey. Had breakfast at the so-called R&R area, makan maggie in the cup, roti and coffee. Then the journey begins! This part of the journey was the most challenging one. Normally people will stopover Cha-am or Hu Hin for a night and the next day continue the journey to Kanchanaburi. But because we had only 5 1/2 days for this trip, we thought we have do it in a day!

Hatyai - Patthalung: heheheh ok je, 45 minutes gitu... I told myself ok nih...

Patthalung - Surat Thani: errr boleh tahan gak ek... Tapi ok lagi... still maintain vogue....

Pitstop - makan buah and minum apa yg patut... Red Bull!

 












Surat Thani - Chumpon: 
Jalan tak berapa cantik so tak leh pegi laju pun, if not melambung-lambung.  We stopped over kat Chumpon for lunch.  Mamamia! The food was superb!!! Sup daging dengan telur dadar je pun tapi sedap giler!  Sembahyang zohor/asar di sini and continued the journey...

 
Chumpon - Pracuep Kiri Khan - Hua Hin - Cha-am - sini pun challenging gak... ingat depa nak tidur kat Cha-am untuk semalam tapi we reached Cha-am dalam kul 5pm.  Nak stop too early, nak continue ada lagi 300km to go... but what the heck! Alang-alang menyeluk pekasam, biar sampai ke pangkal lengan!

Chaam-Petchaburi - masa ni dah mula nak keluar air mata lah kan... badan dah penat, perut dah lapar.  Finally we stopped for early dinner.  Dah mula nak patah semangat tapi mujur ada kawan-kawan yang memberi semangat... pekena sepinggang nasi goreng ikan masin, ceria semula! hahahaha

Petchaburi - Kanchanaburi - makin dekat makin jauh rasanya... counting the miles, sekejap-sekejap tengok signboard, sekejap-sekejap tengok signboard.... akhirnya dalam pukul 9 lebih kami tiba di hotel.  Hati girang tidak terkata!!!!

 

Approaching Bangkok....













Kegirangan!!!! (Walaupun sebelum tu nak nangis la jugak!!!)

Sampai di Kanchanaburi, check-in, freshen up and keluar balik... kami semua pegi mengurut! Lega sikit badannya....

This is where we stayed in Kanchanaburi.  Per night Baht1000.  Ada swimming pool, best!

29th April 2012, Sunday
Esok paginya, awal pagi kami dah bangun tidur sebab nak kejarkan naik keretapi atas Death Railway tu... sesudah subuh kami dah keghabat tuktuk pegi ke stesen keretapi.  This was an experience jugak la... Best!


Tak boleh nak bayangkan betapa siksanya banduan-banduan tu membina landasan keretapi ni kan... Kejam betul orang jepun pada masa tu...

Peh tu kami pusing-pusing gi muzium la, cari t-shirt la, tapi cuaca amatnya la panas.  Rupa-rupanya tengah musim panas...



By after lunch we went back to the hotel, siesta for while.  Tak boleh tahan la, terlalu panas! Furthermore we did not rest adequately the night before.  That evening we took the speedboat, touring the River Kwai, while witnessing the sun set.  It was a moment to remember... very rarely I get to be with Roohii without the kids, so it was a good moment :)

Sunset at the River Kwai... nice kan?


30th April 2012, Monday
Today we start our journey back to the south.  Before leaving Kanchanaburi, we stop by the War Cemetary, paying our respects to the dead. There are the Christian cemetary, a muslim cemetary and a chinese cemetary, all near to each other.






Paying our respects, the gentlemen way...

Paying our respects, the ladies way...

 Air kelapa di waktu panas, heaven!









Berposing for the last time kat Death Railway before proceeding back south....

 
We stopped over at the Damnoen Saduak Floating Marketing.  Kat sini pun best!


The original plan was to stopover at Hatyai, and the next day back to KL so that we have Wednesday as rest day.  But somehow or rather, the plan changed! The new plan was to stopover Surat Thani, then next day to Koh Samui for 1 night, then next day back to KL straight from Koh Samui.  I was a bit not very favorable to this idea but the rest of the gang were thrilled.  So, I had no choice but to follow, after all we did 1000km in a day, what is it to this new plan, right?

So we continued our journey, but because of the strong wind on the highway, we had to stopover at Chaam, it was too dangerous to continue to Surat Thani.  Not a bad decision as it is also a nice place to stay.  It is near the seaside and lots of local are there spending their holiday there (it was a public holiday in Thailand at that time!).  That night we went to the Hua Hin Night Market.


 
1st May 2012, Tuesday
Sesudah subuh kami teruskan perjalanan kami to Koh Samui.  Stopped at Chumpon for early lunch and by the time we reached Koh Samui it was late afternoon.  Another unregretable decision! I totally fell in love with Koh Samui! GBB dah plan tuk pegi ke sini lagi in the next trip... can't wait for that!!!


 
2nd May 2012, Wednesday
This league of the journey was quite challenging.  We got 900km to do and it was already on our fifth day.  Physically and mentally, we were tired by now.  However, as we entered Malaysia, we considered ourselves home already.... A few times I dozed off on the bike, especially from Simpang Pulai to KL... dangerous I know, but I just could keep myself awake.  We finally reached home about 10pm.

It was a journey I would not forget and it was definitely a birthday treat that I will cherish for the rest of my life.  Thanks GBB for the company and it was and will always be a good trip when it comes to you guys!! GBB Rocks!!!

Looking forward to many-many adverture with Roohii.... insyaAllah....

~content Xena~
10 June 2012
8:15pm

Adoi, mana satu nak buat nih...

Satu hari cuti je pun... Tapi work is piling up like a mountain! June-July is always the busiest time of the year. Tak tau which one nak buat dulu... Semuanya urgent...

Itu belum kira kerja rumah la kan...

Huhuhuhu....

~stressed Xena~
8/6/12
11:24pm

Our day out...

Hari ni purposely amik cuti nak bawak anak-anak tengok wayang dan lepak One Utama, window shopping...

Sang Cerdik sibuk sangat nak tengok Madagascar 3 so itulah yang ditontonkan tadi. Dia insist jugak nak tengok yang 3D punya, so rabak la jugak poketku tadi! RM66 for the four of us!

The movie was not bad, funny la jugak macam 1&2... Tapi rasanya ni final movie kot, but tak tau la kan..

Anyway, yang nak story kat sini is attitute orang kat panggung. Cukup la Xena menyampah orang belakang dok tendang-tendang kerusi kita. Mamat belakang kerusi Sang Cerdik duk goyang-goyang kaki, rasanya out of habit agaknya. A few times Xena bagi tenungan tajam mata cute Xena ni, tapi dia buat bodoh je. Well, gelap kan, tapi sebab dah geram jegil jugak biji mata tu. Rasanya dia sendiri pun tak sedar yang dia annoyingkan orang depan dia. Xena dah tak tahan, kita pun raba la belakang kerusi Sang Cerdik, and dapat cekup kaki dia. Apa lagi kena sound la 'STOP KICKING THE CHAIR!'. Dia boleh tak mengaku, mangkuk pun jantan! But after that tak de la that annoying kicking dah...

Geram betul la bila orang darat masuk panggung. Tak bertemadun langsung! So, please la hormat penonton/orang lain bila di panggung ke, teater ke or public places... Kita hidup bukan kita seorang je di dunia nih!

Spoil gak la mood kejap, tapi nasib baik boleh diupliftedkan balik dengan window shopping, nge nge nge! Yes, window shopping ya, yang shopping adalah orang lain ya... Roohii beli jam, untuk casual wear katanya (alasan je tu). Me? Not this time, later... Somebody is in Europe now so sudh kirim something, and a friend is going to US soon, and sudah kirim dia jugak... Apa lagi la yang dikirim melainkan hangbag dan handbag... Hahahahha... Once Xena dapat kiriman-kiriman tu, Xena post kat sini ok???

;)
~content Xena~
6/6/12
9:37pm

Awatla hati ini sayu...

Tough day today... End of the day entah napa hati ini sayu... Kenapa ya? Tak tau la napa...

Lagu 'Kasih Tercipta' playing on the radio, automatic je tears ni keluar... Awat la sayu sangat ek?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfLrk3pv81A&feature=youtube_gdata_player

- the truth and facts of life hurts
- a friend just got some unplesant news
- work stress is hitting me

Wahai hati bangkitlah....

Generation Gap

Today is girls-day-out...

Hanging out at Wangsa Walk with my girl and my 2 nieces. Catched a movie, Mirror Mirror, quite a good movie. I loved Julia Robert's acting as the wicked queen. I am now at the waiting area, waiting for karaoke room to be ready.

While waiting, can't help myself in observing people around me... Here I am surrounded by youngsters, those around my daughter's age. Their fashion, how they talk with their friends, their style, I feel such a distance from them. I feel so old. But I still remeber when I was at their age. The style was diferrent. We were different before.

Oh well, just bite the bullet and move on....

~old Xena~
11 April 2012
2:48pm

My Geng, My Friends, those who makes me happy....

In life we need friends. Well, I do...These are the friends that I have made throughout my life and they are the one who have been there for me think and thin...

My MRSM Geng

These are my friends from my life in MRSM Beseri. Till now we still hangout together. With them I can be like a teenager :). They are the ones who accept me as who I am. They truly understands my outspoken character without having any grudges.

Elia, my excubemate, we just can't stand pretenders....
Hajjah Emy, now a certified diver, how I envy you...
Pnutt, my OCD mate...
Iza, my idol of beauty tips...
Hajjah Eynaa, how do you maintain that figure with 4 kids...
Anis, the strongest gal I ever known...
Ellie, minah vogue yg pandai buat kek cantik-cantik till I don't dare to eat it....
Imah, kecik molek tapi power....

You gals rock! I can share whatever secret I have with them and no matter how dark the secret, they will never judge me. You guys, I love you all so much!

My Bikers geng

Ini geng dipanggil GBB... Geng Bawak Bini... hahahaha... more like Bini yang asyik nak ikut...This geng pun rock! I met them from a trip, well, our first biking trip to Thailand. At that time we were using the Orange BlackBird. We went to Koh Lipe and we somehow just clicked from the beginning...
Team members are (semua bukan nama sebenar!):
- B and Laling
- Pakcu and Wancu
- Ayang and Azura
- Tasya and Lala
- Ruby and Zamrud
- Imam and Wife

Also in my bikerz geng would be my cousins, Jering, Dino n Johan... hehehehe the clans of Pakngah Laksa!

Setakat ni, we all got chemistry and I do hope this chemistry will last forever. Been into other geng in particular geng kereta lain, but after a while we broke apart. So, GBB, let's make this a long lasting relationship ya....

My Geng SM/Geng Ngaji

These are my neighbours actually, who are also in Roohii's geng mengaji.  Rumah kami jadi port untuk belajar mengaji 2 kali seminggu.  Alhamdulilah, they all dah naik Quran dah la ni.  Ini geng jugak kami clicked from beginning and we have organized various family trips thoughout Malaysia.  One good thing about this group, membersnya tidak berkira dan sangat bermurah hati.  Segala pemberian saya ucapkan ribuan terima kasih.  Semoga Allah memberkati kalian semua....

My office geng

Haaaaa ini geng lunch saya... yg kiri sekali my boss, dan dia jarang ada kat ofis so jarang lunch dgn kami.  Kanan saya Azwin, kiri saya Kak Bib... kami selalu makan bertiga...  Selalunya kami makan kat Tesco, tapi kekadang kat Restoren Cherry Bawah Jambatan Penchala Link kat Kg Penchala... situ sedaaaaappp, banyak lauk.  Tapi banyak lauk pun tiap kali ke sana pasti makan ikan patin masak tempoyak... hahahaha


My VOCM geng

Ini time Roohii main Volvo hari tu.  Geng ni best gak cuma sekarang ni cam dah berpecah la... As I said earlier, some group are just not meant to be.  However, I had fun during the good old days...  I am still in touch and in good terms with some of them though...

Friends, we do need them....  I treasure my friends, and I hope they do the same for me...

 ~Xena~
18 March 2012
10:36pm

My Riding Experience: Trip to Melaka 11th March 2011

Last Sunday kami pegi ride ke Melaka. Ada kenduri kahwin anak sedara kawan bikers Roohii. At first I thought just nak pegi ride jalan-jalan cari makan, rupanya nak pegi kenduri kahwin. First time langgar etika attire ke kenduri kahwin.

Nak baca kisah journey kami? Haaaaaa pegi link di bawah ni... My aunty (juga geng bikers aku!) does a better job in blogging our event...

http://mawarputihsuciku.blogspot.com/2012/03/pakngah-kawin-upss-anak-sedara-pakngah.html

Haaaa mcm mana, best tak blog my aunty?

:)

Xena
13-Mar-2012
4:33pm

Sad news about a friend

Last Sunday night. I hangout with a friend and his family. We haven't hangout with them for such a very long time, I think more than a year. It was really good to meet up and catch up with each other....

Among other things, I was updated with the story of my other friend, in the same circle of group, that her husband has 'opened another branch'. It really hurt me cause this is like a few cases in a period of 1-2 years and happened to my good friends. I mean, usually I only heard it happen to people out there, but when it happen in front of my eyes, it has gotten me very scared and sad...

Poligamy, such a sacred word for the men but a painful word for women. No matter what people say or the teaching of Islam says that women who accept poligamy will be given such great reward and redemption, I can't seem to accept it. I know it is wrong as we should accept it as a thing Allah permits, but I just simply can't. It's just too hurtful. How much a guy can't share their women same goes to women. I don't deny the fact that it is something yang besar pahalanya. Payung emas bak kata orang. Yang lelaki pulak, kalau dapat membimbing dengan baiknya 2,3 atau 4 masjid, memang syurga balasannya. Tapi nowadays yang cam gitu cuma ada 1-2 kes je kot. Yang lain semuanya atas dasar 'nafsu'. Itu belum lagi kes-kes curang, main kayu tiga, menipu isteri tua, etc. etc. etc.

I may not really know how it feels to be sharing my husband but thinking about it is painful enough. To my friends who are unfortunate (or is it fortunate?), I pray for their ultimate happiness. Semoga Allah memberkati kalian...

~worried Xena~
13th March 2012
4:41pm

Terasa keinsafan...

Tonight on the National Geographic channel, they aired the compilation of amateur video clippings of the Japan 2011 Earthquake/Tsunami disaster, starting with the 6 minute quake to the after shocks to the tsunami to the day after the tsunami, in rememberance of the disaster that happenned almost a year ago...

I still remember that day...

11 March 2011, about 4pm:
My colleagues and I were in Pangkor, having our Offsite Annual Dinner cum team building event. After the treasure hunt, we had a couple of hour to rest in our rooms before the dinner. My roomate and I were lazing in our room while watching the telly. Somehow we put on the news channel. As we watched the disaster happening right before our eyes, we were also quite worried about being on the island. I was about to take the next ferry back to Lumut and grab whatever transportation I could get, to get back to KL. But after calling here and there, searching the net on tsunami warnings for our country and got the latest update from the news, we just carried on our stay there.

That night we couldn't really sleep peacefully and left the telly on so that we could get the latest updates as soon as we open our eyes.

Now, watching that documentary really makes me wonder and think back about my life. The quake was only 6 minutes, what about doomsday?

O God Almighty, aku mohon keampunan di atas segala dosa-dosaku...

I feel so small...

~a bit scared Xena~
8 March 2012

Rombongan Cik Xena

23rd - 28th February 2012

Rombongan Cik Xena kali ini ke Semarang. Ni semua gara-gara route baru AirAsia la ni...

Keluarga my other half berasal dari Semarang. My in-laws came to Malaysia in 1962. They still have siblings in Semarang. So Roohii still have many relatives there. We visit them like every 2-3 years. Since I married his family, I have been there maybe around 6 times.

It's kindda nice to have relatives from a different country. We get to know other way of life and thinking. Malaysia dan Indonesia serumpun tapi sangat berbeda!

Apa yang best di sana? Well, food is cheap and nice. But not as many variety like Malaysia. Their food biasalah the penyets, the bakars, the tempe and the tauhu (soya bean based food). Their sambal terasi, walla! Sedap ....

Shopping ok la, but honestly Thailand is a better place to shop. I don't really fancy batik so my shopping were around factory outlets. Sang Lembut got herself 2 pairs of Miss Sixty jeans. Sang Cerdik got 2 pieces of Angry Bird t-shirts. Roohii got his working shirts and I got 2 pair of Kickers! Not that many? Ok, ok, there were other things as well... What to do, I'm a shopperholic!

Family in Semarang took good care of us, and their hospitality were superb! Thank you so much Dek Ariep, Dek Debby, Nabila dan Kia for having us at your beautiful home for 5 nights. Thanks also to Pak Sabar being our supir and Mbak Som for helping taking care of our laundry.

As usual it was a memorable trip... Looking forward for our next visit there... But I believe they have to visit us first before our next trip there ;)

Here are some photos to share...

~happy Xena~
2/3/12

Here we go again...

We have not even got it, but 'it' has already started...

Sometimes I just don't know how to handle this matter. When we don't allow or don't support, we are being controlling. But when we let them loose, they just don't know how to balance things.

A part of my heart says it's ok cause happiness is my highest priority. But a part of my heart is getting worried that the cycle will repeat itself. I can see it happening, happening real soon..

How do I convey the message of my uneasyness without having getting into a strained situation? I just don't know how. So the best solution is to just swallow and put aside how I feel and concentrate on the hapiness of others.

Good luck Xena... May Allah give you the strength... You go girl!

Here we go again...

~mentally prepared Xena~
21February 2012
11:12pm

My favourite place to hangout...

This is my favourite part of my house....
This is where I get to be by myself, enjoying my favourite channels; TLC, AFC, Discovery Home and Health, Diva, StarWorld dan seangkatan dengannya....
This is where I'd be first thing in the morning during weekends, making myself a cup of Gold Blend while watching Cake Boss making his great looking cakes, with the rest still sleeping...
This is where I prepare food for my family....
This is where we have our meals while watching the news....
This is we talk about how our day was and whining about how hard life can be....
This is where I'd be scrubbing when I'm upset that I feel like cleaning the house...
I just love this part of the house...